So often we read and hear coaches and public speakers talking about success and the importance of being successful in life.
But what is your definition of success? And what are your feelings and the first thoughts that come up to your mind when you encounter this word and start visualising your personal goals?
I have always thought that, to be successful, I had to be physically attractive, cool and friendly enough to be the one that everyone wants to hang out with, but also smart and educated to make my parents proud of me for my good marks at school and my achievements in my career.
I have always felt the need to prove to myself and to others that I was capable and good at something, most probably because of my own weaknesses and insecurities. Long story short, I ended up believing that being good was not enough anymore, and that, instead, I had to be exceptional to guarantee a prosperous future, not only for myself, but also for my family.
Coming from a humble background, I have had to fight for my dreams. I have had to give up many things, thus I became money-oriented as a consequence of it.
The fact is that we live in a society that constantly confronts us with a harsh reality that makes us believe that we have to be always on top, like some sort of robots that should just produce and consume.
Surely, a wealthy lifestyle makes you live better, but is this really what would make you happy? Is it what you want?
It took me a while to realise that money is not everything, and that my own happiness does not depend on my monthly income and on how much I have in my saving accounts.
Life is much more valuable than that, and so are you.
And if you invest your time focusing exclusively on your future, you will end up being perpetually unsatisfied and unhappy. This will lead you to experience stress and anxiety.
And what for? Is it really worthy if you then become unable to enjoy the present moment?
Why am I talking about this right now and isn’t this principle in contradiction with most models of reality and concepts that we get every day from society?
Well, I am not saying that you should settle down and stop setting goals. It’s a great thing to be driven, trust me.
What I am trying to do instead, is to encourage you to think about what really matters for yourself, focusing for a moment on your scale of values.
What is more important for you? It may be love, it may be your health, or either your career progression or your family. Only you should know the answer to this question.
If you don’t, it might be that at some point in your life, you will be hit by a river in flood that will force you to have a break. And only then, when you won’t have any other excuse, you will disconnect from the rest of the world and concentrate on yourself, realising that what you have always considered crucial was not so essential as you thought.
Because, believe it or not, the more you will move forward, the less you will be able to celebrate your achievements if you do not enjoy the present, starting to appreciate the little things around you.
I have learned the hard way that my own happiness cannot be measured, and neither my personal life and my freedom. And that I can only be successful if I am happy within myself. Everything comes afterwards.
Thus, you will be able to define your meaning of success once you have a clear vision of your values, and then moving forward to your targets.
My advice to you is: be grateful for what you already have, live every second to the fullest because time does not go back, open up to other’s visions, but do not let yourself be overwhelmed by them. Because only you should know what is more relevant for you and who you want to be in the future in order to be successful.
