It is not more about what men want from us, now it is time to focus on what we want, instead.
The ‘sexy perfect supermodels’ dominating the catwalks are a bit dated nowadays. In an era of inclusivity, a new type of woman becomes the protagonist of the future fashion scene: the empowered woman.
Goodbye Fallen Angels, this is a rebirth for Victoria’s Secret, which represents the new company updated marketing strategy, the VS Collective, a massive change in the lingerie world.
Do you remember those beautiful creatures walking the runaway, so perfect not to seem real? You will no longer see them, as they have now been replaced by a new concept of woman, much classier and more authentic.
We need reality, not plastic dolls. We are not bodies without a substance. We are intelligent, smart, we are multitalented. We have a soul and an essence that make us unique and special. And we should leave a mark and be remembered for our personalities, no more for our shapes or for what we wear.
This is the message that the greatest designers have been launching since 2017, when France was the first country revolutionizing the whole world of fashion by banning the use of unhealthily thin models from the runaways. Since then, society continued to evolve, and women’s power and success together with it.
This is how, in an ever-changing time, VS decided to surprise us with a well-thought choice, altering its narrative around sensuality and becoming ‘an advocate for all women’, by proposing real ambassadors like Megan Rapinoe, an American athlete and gender equality campaigner, Eileen Gu, a 17-year-old Chinese American freestyle skier, the actress and entrepreneur Priyanka Chopra Jonas and the transgender model Valentina Sampaio.
There is no more space for the ‘Barbie Avatar’, as dubbed by The New York Times. The new generations need to be motivated by strong and ambitious women, by inspirational figures who can lead the way and prove that we, as women, have much more to offer than a pair of beautiful legs.
But this is not all! When it comes to inclusiveness, VS must make an important step also regarding its sizing choice: everyone should be able to access to its collection, and this has not been possible so far due to the brand’s limited sizing options.
Regardless, VS has reassured its regular buyers that this change will be happening soon, in addition to an introduction of a nursing bra and a maternity lingerie to the popular brand.
Will it be a success? Surely it will be a significant step on women’s fashion, completely changing the female stereotype of ‘hot mindless bodies’ and replacing it with a more considerable one.
This is a very controversial topic for the Women Empowerment Movement as it is extremely frustrating having to face criticism, still now in 2021, when it is relating to our physical appearance and our own choices.
If we dress to draw the eye, we are either too provocative or too little intelligent, and we should not be complaining about men being flirty with us, as we are the first ones giving a wrong impression of ourselves (this is what we have been hearing for ages, even in the worst cases when there are victims of domestic abuses and rapes)
When, instead, we overdress we lack personality, or we are considered too serious for most men’s tastes.
It is time to change this concept by starting to promote a different image of us. We, as women, want to be sexy and seductive not only for the way we present ourselves, but also for our mind, opinion, and education. We are tired to be classified as dolls because we are truly authentic.
We want to be respected and to be loved for who we really are, not for how we look. We want to be engaged in deep conversations, and we want our man to ask for our opinion when needed.
We want to feel supportive and important for someone, no more the ‘entertainer who occasionally fills your spare time’.
Therefore, VS has decided to open its doors to all women, rather than been focusing on one female model only, thus being more diverse and inclusive.
With a new ideal of a woman, we have now the freedom to express our personalities, giving ourselves the right value that we deserve.
The message that the fashion industry is trying to convey is that we, as women, are powerful in every single aspect who better represents us, and everyone should start seeing this by welcoming a new product which empathizes a veil of reality and authenticity.
Summer is upon us, and finally, after so long, you can sense a feeling of optimism in the air.
Restrictions have been eased, people are meeting up again and the weather is delighting us with amazing sunny days.
But how does this “going back to normal” translate to clothes?
As you can imagine, last year has been pretty challenging for the fashion industry – as for every other environment – with many changes and innovations, not only from a stylistic point of view, but also from a marketing perspective. The digital world has taken over, revolutionising entirely the international Fashion Weeks.
With the new ‘Work From Home’ routine, the loungewear has become the unexpected biggest trend of fashion 2020, together with a new proposal of fantastical fashion. Frothy dresses, mood-boosting prints and bright and soothing colours that take inspiration from natural elements have been selected with the aim of giving people a sense of hope and positivity.
“When the grey clouds disperse, we see the sunshine” says Pantone’s executive director, Leatrice Eiseman. And this is how the transformation from the Ultimate Grey evolves to a radiant yellow hue, Illuminating, protagonist of a new life after a tumultuous year. These two shades are usually paired together to convey a message of stability and unity.
Balmain & Versace
But what about the hot Pink Cosmos, which is one of the most popular colour trends of spring 2021, capturing the attention of everyone for the vitality that transmits? We have seen it literally everywhere, from the Grammy Awards red carpet to the Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards. This colour has certainly stood out from the rest for his vibrant, uplifting and flirtatious touch.
Valentino – Dolce & Gabbana
Together with the brightest tones, designers have decided to readapt the use of Cherry Red – one of the major colour trends of Winter 2019 – to give a bit of romance to the upcoming season, combined with a dominant and fiery character, the ideal choice after the current uncertainty.
Many people have lost not only their main occupation during lockdown, but also their confidence and personal balance. Thus, the powerful presence of vivid colours this year, to communicate strength and courage to the wearer, combined with the use of Burnt Orange and Buttery Cream tones.
Ermanno Scervino & Lanvin
But, as every spring and summer season has its pastel shades, 2021 runways could not be more fresh and sparkling thanks to the careful search for relaxing nuances after the neon colours we saw earlier. This is why the fashion trends of the year end with a wide selection of green and blue, such as Mint, Aquamarine, Avocado, Pistachio, Seafoam, etc.
Ulla Johnson & Boss
Once again, the most prestigious designers like Versace, Alberta Ferretti, Armani, Boss, Ferragamo, Miu Miu, etc surprise us with their unique and refined creations, proposing on the catwalk something that reflects reality and contemporary society.
Style is not pure coincidence. As I mentioned in my previous articles, fashion is a mirror, it is a voice, the expression of modernity. You have to know how to interpret it to understand the message that trends release. And 2021 surely will be a memorable historic moment for all of us, not only because of a virus that has left a mark on our everyday lives, but also for the feelings and the energy that are conveyed to us by the entire world of fashion.
Do you dress to be noticed? You like to be in the spotlight when everybody stares at you with that typical expression of envy or perhaps of genuine admiration on their face. It makes you feel unique, strong, powerful.
Or, by contrast, do you dress in a certain way to avoid people’s judgment and any sort of negative comment? Gossip puts pressure on you, making you nervous and uncomfortable.
Either way, your style reveals a lot about your personality, combined with your posture and body language. However, sometimes the clothes you wear become a proper shield that protects you from external factors, hiding your real identity or making it more acceptable by society or even by yourself.
When I was younger, I went through a huge variety of different styles, hair colours and haircuts, all concomitantly with my emotional state of that moment.
There was a part of me constantly seeking validation, and another one that could not tolerate any form of criticism and assumptionsat all.
This has made me suffer a lot, with my two personalities always contradictory between each other, not knowing who I had to listen to and which belief I should have gotten rid of.
In both cases, I was not being myself. I was just living my life, making my own choices based on other people’s opinionsand stereotypes.
Have you ever heard of Compulsive Approval-Seeking? A compulsive approval-seeking behaviour is generated by a low self-esteem. This sense of inferiority arises from many factors. Some relate to your personality, while others stem from external influences such as your upbringing, cultural experiences, education, and work life.
In my 13, when I was at Secondary School, I knew that to be popular and to be accepted by my school mates I had to wear make-up, a new pair of Adidas Gazzelle and the latest fashion trends, to not forget the unmissable leather jacket that everyone used to have.
The concept of ‘dress to be appreciated’, with the passing of time, became unconsciously a real belief in my mind, influencing my persona, my behaviours and my whole life.
As wrong as it could be, I have always thought that I had to look nice for others first, rather than for myself, and that I had to keep up with the role models proposed by TV, magazines and by mass media in order to be fully integrated into the social system, an altogether nonsensical concept!
It took me more than 15 years before realising that I did not even know who I was, what I like and who I wanted to be. Imagine the massive impact that society has on people’s lifestyle and mental health!
But I am not here to talk about myself.
I am here to talk about you, instead, as I would like to help you, through my own experience, to find your own identity, in order to increase your level of confidence and self-esteem. Thus, you will have a better understanding of what you are passionate about, what is that makes you feel good, and what does your dream life look like.
While reading this article, I would like you to take some time to fully focus on the clothes you are currently wearing.
Does your outfit reflect your personality? Or is it based on the influence of someone else’s preferences, social media, and more generically, of the social environment?
Be honest with yourself, though.
I want you to look at that mirror, wondering if you really think you know that woman in front of you. Is she familiar to you? Or is she a perfect stranger?
Most people see fashion as something trivial that does not determine someone’s personality, but today I want to dispel a myth, as it is the exact opposite.
Sometimes the most extravagant minds dress flashy to get attention as seeking constant validations. They are not confident enough within themselves, so they need approval from others.
Occasionally, if you are shy, you would prefer to be reserved, not showing a lot about yourself, keeping a more neutral style that could make you feel comfortable and less under pressure.
But, let me tell you something. In both cases, you would not be happy as you would not be real. You would suffer inwardly as you won’t be free to express who you are as too scared and affected by people’s judgments.
Therefore, the moral of this story is still the same: get to know your nature and learn how to give yourself the right values that you deserve. No one else will do it for you.
If you do not love yourself first, you will keep waiting for someone to compliment you with the usual ‘useless flatteries’ that you have been hearing for ages.
Nice words are only a rebound from a sense of emptiness that depends nothing but on yourself.
Many of you may be wondering if it is possible to create a unique, first-class style with a low budget. My answer to your question is simple: anything you want is possible!
In the last few days, I have been reading many articles about similar topics, just to be aware of different points of view and to indulge my curiosity with this common issue, which is a proper dilemma to me: I want to be classy, but my budget does not allow me to.
First of all, clear your mind of any negative language that you might subconsciously use within yourself. It is vital that, from now on, you are going to believe that you can do anything you want, as you have an incredible power: you are responsible for your own choices and for your life, and you are in control of it.
Now, let’s move on to our list of useful tips!
The first suggestion I am going to share with you, which is the most important to me is:
Have an objective and a role model, someone you are fascinated by
Photo by cottonbro from Pexels
What is your goal? You want luxury and a wealthy lifestyle but you work in a hotel and all you can do is just dream when you are assisting your guests at the check-in. Buls**t!
If you have a clear target and a picture of who you want to be, find a role model who you can be inspired by, and you will have that image stuck in your head that will help you to gain more confidence along your path.
I have always been fascinated by women in business with character and strong personalities, wearing their monochromatic and minimal suits that I find incredibly sexy and charming. I honestly do not focus on only one model, as there are so many examples of great women in history and contemporary figures, that I have at least one mentor in each environment.
Regardless, to avoid dwelling too much on the details, this is just for you to understand the importance of setting goals, having a vision and be surrounded by inspiring people, not only in this specific circumstance but also in every part of everyday life.
Once you know what you want to achieve and you keep the end goal in mind, the rest will just kind of fall into place in a natural way.
Now, what you should do before venturing into the beauty of fashion is:
2. Embark on a deep digital journey into the top trends and the latest designs
Photo by Dziana Hasanbekava from Pexels
You must always be on top of the trends, being fully aware of what is in the market and what are the new proposals, colours of the upcoming season, fabrics etc.
I would suggest you to spend some time reading fashion magazines or simply having a deeper look at their websites. For instance, I am a great fan of Vogue and Conde Nast (it is no coincidence that two of the strongest women in business of which I am inspired by are Franca Sozzaniand Anna Wintour. Both journalists and editor-in-chief of Vogue).
Educate yourself, so that you will become familiar with the world of fashion and its incredible history. This will also help you to increase your ideas and creativity.
Once you know what to look for, you are going to focus on the financial aspect of the whole shopping adventure.
To do this:
3. Set up a separate Saving Pot in your current Bank Account
Photo by Kristina Paukshtite
You have absolutely no intention of spending more than how much you set out to previously, so ease up on your self-judgement and do as you promised yourself!
I know it is not always easy to resist the temptation of buying that stunning dress in the window that you are already dreaming of wearing on your next date, but this is also a great opportunity to prove yourself that you know how to control your impulses!
Thus, make a financial plan, set a budget and stick to it! It is not difficult to do it, and I am sure most of you have an online mobile banking app within your Bank Account. I have multiple pots that I use on several occasions. It takes literally a few seconds to create a new savings pot, so that you will be always aware of your expenses.
4. Buy clearance clothing or second hands accessories
Photo by collis from Pexels
I believe most of you may be thinking right now: how can I be on top of the latest trends if I purchase the inventories of the previous season? Well, you can if you follow my previous advice, but first of all, you must have good taste in fashion, and I am sure you do!
In my 28 years, I do not remember even once where I purchased an item belonging to the new arrivals. Or if I did, it was very rare.
I have always been limited on budget and I could not afford the luxury brands, therefore my only chance was to wait for the sales to start!
In my opinion, it is much better to buy good quality fabrics from the clearance clothing sections, rather than spending less in cheaper brands like Primark, Boohoo, Missguided, etc.
You could also have a look at TK Maxx (you can find plenty of good deals there), or explore websites like Wardow and Zalando (I have purchased some trendy handbags there too, and I was quite happy with their service) or buy second-hand garments (be careful though before trusting a seller, it is important that you will go through their history and reviews first, paying full attention to every single detail of each item).
I personally do not like online shopping when it is relating to clothes that I have not tried yet, as my body shape is uncommon (and I am sure most of you, like me, might have different sizes from your waist to your bust), therefore I prefer to try each garment in the shop first, and then completing the whole shopping process though the official websites or, occasionally, on e-Bay for a cheaper price.
It is the same when it is relating shoes, as patterns might not always fit properly.
But as for the rest, you can give free rein to your creativity with the accessories, buying what you like the most online.
Another very important bit of advice that I would like you to consider is:
5. Make a list of 4 – 6 outfits that you are planning to create
Photo by Lum3n from Pexels
This will also include a basic idea of the main colours of your clothes. Put as much detail as possible; it will help you to avoid wasting time with a vague destination or vision of what you are going to wear and who you are going to be on that particular scenario.
Fashion is an incredible world, as it gives you the freedom to be yourself, expressing your personality in a thousand different ways.
And if you have a proper plan, setting a list will help you a lot with developing organisational skills that you did not even think you could have, which you will find extremely useful on many different occasions in the future.
You will become faster in making decisions, very selective, and I would say, extraordinarily exclusive, which are also a few essential qualities that you should have when it is relating to fashion.
Once you have a proper scheme, you will be ready for the following step:
6. Start by shopping for the main items of clothing first, then the accessories
Photo by Gustavo Fring from Pexels
Focus on your first outfit by selecting the main garments first. The rest will come later on.
Let’s just say that you are going to purchase an egyptian blue dress. You may want to combine an ivory or a cream jacket with it, and then a gold Swarovski belt, same as your gold pouch and your glamour 10cm court heels that will leave everyone breathless.
You will realise how naturally the whole process of styling will come to you, accessory by accessory, detail by detail.
By contrast, if you will start buying the jewellery, then the bag, then the hat, you will end up in a sea of confusion, losing your direction completely.
7. Maintain a natural taste when selecting the fabrics
Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko from Pexels
Monochromatic colours are always the best way to start creating a unique outfit, because of their single base hue with their elegant shades and tones, achieved by the use of a white tint.
Not only they are very easy to be combined with different fabrics and colours, but they also offer you the chance to play with only a few quality garments, exchanging them multiple times, without having to invest a huge amount of money on clothing.
This is what really defines you as a creative and brilliant stylist, making you stand out from your competitors.
Keeping a neutral style will also give a positive image of you as a classy and elegant woman, who does not need to show off to be attractive, falling into vulgarity.
8. Dress for your body shape, be aware of your proportions
Photo by Nappy from Pexels
Let’s now have a deeper look at the morphological aspect.
We all know we have a unique body shape and proportions. We can only dream of wearing a pair of flared jeans like the perfect Charlie’s Angels if, in real life, we are short and tiny like Kylie Minogue. Let’s be honest!
However, this is not the end of the world as, luckily, we always keep a varied quantity of high heels in our walk-in closet.
The only detail that makes the difference is how you wear what you love, and obviously, your posture.
Do not go for a long trench coat if it reaches your ankles and you are only 5’2 (I made this mistakes several times, as I was not perfectly aware of how proportions work; I thought I was looking cool, when instead I was far from it!).
You should look at yourself as cut into thirds from your shoulders to your feet. You want either one third on top and two thirds on the bottom (let’s suppose you are wearing a shirt and a trouser) or two thirds on top and one third on bottom. Dividing yourself in half would be just wrong!
And in regards to fitting, never wear a garment which is too big or too small! That would not make you look more stylish. The more volume your clothes have, the skinnier you will appear if you are underweight. And the tighter you will dress, the more you will show your extra pounds, looking like a sausage that is going to explode!
9. Do not mix many different designs and prints or silver with gold
Your goalis to look as neutral as possible. You are a professional,you cannot afford to give a wrong impression of yourself, turning into trash.
More than two fabrics or textures in an outfit would just be too much, not to mention the offensive habit of combining different designs together – do not mix a floral shirt with striped trousers…It would just be like a poke in the eyes! All you want is to be unique by creating an authentic style that will represent your personality with class and elegance…and gold with silver would simply destroy this concept!
Although accessories are the final touch to make you look perfect and impeccable, this does not mean they are the least important, and you want to make sure they are paired correctly.
Remember, little details can make a huge difference; it is very easy to ruin your reputation because of an insignificant mistake.
And now that we are coming to the end of this long, but hopefully helpful article, I would like to dedicate the final session to women’s unconditional love for shoes and heels: the higher they are, the less comfortable they will be!
10: Hence, forget about high heels if you cannot walk naturally with them
Photo by Rodolfo Clix from Pexels
Confident women show their ease in every occasion, especially when walking.
You want to be comfortable and sexy, thus make sure not to be a wader in trouble while trying to keep the balance!
It is much better to wear a shorter heel, rather than looking ridiculous or clumsy.
In my opinion, the ideal height should be 6 cm, maximum 10, without a plateau.
Leave your ballerina pumps and loafers on the back burner, lock it and throw the key away! Flat shoes are not as beneficial as you think. They are likely to cause back pain and vertebral column problems.
You should always be loyal to your 2 cm walking shoes, if you want to carry them with you while on public transports or after a long night out dancing.
Remember: fashion is an art but your health should always come first, no matter what.
Before you leave…
Do not wear something because it is trendy. Never run with the crowd trying to be like anybody else. Seek inspiration by identifying your role models, educate yourself through continuous research of fashion, but do not let it own you!
I assume you already know who you are and what you want to achieve in the future. And if you are still not sure about it, just the fact that you are here right now, reading this article, looking for support and advice is the proof that you have already made an important choice in your life: you want to stand out from the pack!
Photo by Moose Photos from Pexels
You are a great woman, you are ambitious, you have character.
Bring that grit out with class and determination, dress chic but authentically.
Now, wear that confidence and get ready to take on the world!
